|Dale Carnegie (Wikipedia)|
Not long ago, I listened to Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. It was originally published in 1936, so I'm a bit late to the game.
I've found myself smiling, time and again, as I've listened to 40s-era advice that sounds like the latest pearls of wisdom from the social networking gurus. I trained as a historian, so I know that there's really nothing new under the sun. Still, I was intrigued by the parallels.
This page provides an index to the series of Tuesday articles I ran discussing each principle as it applies to writers.
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
- Don't criticize, condemn, or complain.
- Give honest and sincere appreciation.
- Arouse in the other person an eager want.
- Become genuinely interested in other people.
- Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
- Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
- Talk in the terms of the other man's interest.
- Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.
- Avoid arguments.
- Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never tell someone they are wrong.
- If you're wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
- Begin in a friendly way.
- Start with questions the other person will answer yes to.
- Let the other person do the talking.
- Let the other person feel the idea is his/hers.
- Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
- Sympathize with the other person.
- Appeal to noble motives.
- Dramatize your ideas.
- Throw down a challenge and don't talk negative when the person is absent, talk about only positive.
Finally, here's a retrospective on the series.
[This material is also available in Professional Relationships, book 2 of the Dunlith Hill Writers Guides.]